The COVID-19 pandemic has been constantly discussed in social conversations and published throughout the media. For some of us, the impact of social isolation and distancing has left us to frequently deal with our own thoughts. Rumination and catastrophising are two negative thinking styles which may develop when we struggle to manage intrusive thoughts that arise in consciousness. As a result of this pandemic, many of us have struggled to deal with our intrusive thoughts. It’d likely be difficult for us to be grateful for different aspects of our lives right now, such as our friends, family, jobs and hobbies. This may be problematic for us because if we’re feeling a lessened sense of gratitude, we may feel more withdrawn, lonely and disconnected.
With the constant stress that has been present in our society throughout this year, it may be useful to take a step back and ask yourself: what am I grateful for right now? Who am I grateful for in my life? What aspects of my life enrich me and give me a sense of value? The act of gratitude is vital in a community setting as it can establish a sense of comradery as well as a desire to help others. Now, with the easing of social restrictions, it could be useful to consider how you can help others in your community. The act of gratitude strengthens the sense of connectedness with our interpersonal relationships by increasing a sense of happiness, life satisfaction and social desirability.
Feeling grateful for the people we respect and admire helps us identify our values. Establishing what our values are is an important step towards creating a rich and meaningful life. Reflect on the feelings that you personally experience when you feel a sense of gratitude for those that you care about. You can also ask yourself:
How do you express gratitude for your loved ones?
What feelings arise for you when you feel grateful for others?
How do you feel when others express gratitude towards you?
I’d now ask you to join in with a Metta Meditation. This practice involves the intention to develop a specific state of mind centring around feeling a sense of love, kindness and gratitude. The thoughts involved in this practice focus on your desire for you and others to experience as much well-being as possible. If you like, please follow the script and practice this in your own time.
Take a few deep breaths.
Think about a person in your life who you love or have a deep sense of respect for, someone with which your relationship doesn’t have complications.
Hold this person in your mind and with the voice of your mind, slowly repeat “may you be happy”, “may you be free from suffering”, “may your hopes for this life be realised”. You can make up your own statements or use these.
As you think of phrases of this kind, try and connect with their emotional significance. You really do want these individuals to feel a sense of happiness and see if you can feel this.
Keep this person in your mind and consciously wish them well.
“May you be free from suffering”.
When you notice that you become distracted, try and feel a sense of relaxation and bring this person back to mind, consciously wishing for them to feel a sense of happiness.
It could be useful to visualise this person experiencing a sense of happiness.
Before you finish the meditation, realise that you also want yourself to be happy.
Bring yourself to mind and go through these same thoughts for yourself.
“May you be happy”, “may you be free from suffering”.
Potentially look at your own experiences of life from the perspective of a best friend. Note to yourself that they really want happiness for you.
*If you remember the script, try and complete this practice with your eyes closed.
Reflect on the different sensations, emotions and thoughts that you feel after this practice. How does being grateful for people who are important in our lives make us feel?
This blog was written and prepared by Tom - Psychologist here at MWG.